Missing Pieces

Walking down the lane alone after work saying good bye to him, as we've both turned around with our backs facing each other. Is another way of saying we've our life to return. A life which i wished I could have with him unfortunately it will not happened.

I wonder when will i have the courage to express my true thoughts that hiding myself away?
it's my weakness. Whenever i meet someone whom i truly love, fate isn't going to make it happend for us whom usually end myself with a badly injured heart.

ppl comment that i shouldn't deserved to be alone for all these while.
I think i should because i've caused this to myself. it's my fault because my insecurity of love is just not going to go away.

It has been several times, i've let go of ppl whom i truly love. it hurts.

Falling in love

Falling in love is a complicated process. It's continuously repetition of efforts in a different way to keep the chemistry sparkling. Yet how long will the experiments work?

It has come to my thoughts that it may be rather a life without for me. I dislike the wondering process of what the person I may love are thinking. Combining "both souls together as one" is not just words; it's nearly an impossible mission.

We tend to believe in dreams or situations that may not exist and think all about the wonderful love yet it's only our imagination that seems to be telling what our hearts wants to hear. Isn’t that silly?

Because if that dream or hope isn't true.

It's heartbreaking as ever and healing the wound that has been caused can seem to be a forever process.

Endless seconds

There seems to be all history written all over one's life as every second passes by. Though we may not be aware at our slightest seconds but it does have a huge differences. Every second that counts. It's those feelings and thoughts that were accumulated at those times that make decisions for us in the following journey. A journey in life seems to be endless.

A moment of time

Many many years ago, there was a moment ..... A very special friend and I were seating at the window opening, with our feets freezing on the roof staring across the houses or sky. * I still remembered how beautiful and relaxing it was. *Sharing stories under the stars. * It was a unforgettable night which I still remembered it like yesterday. The only difference btw now and before, he is very far away like the stars many years ago. Memories are only the place that I'll see him again.


- Memories -

There was a night he has made me dinner which I refuse to believe a guy will be able to cook. As he was making dinner, I was busy making jokes about his food. We both laughed and those moments were so simple & happy. As he walked out of the kitchen with the plate of food, I was amazed with the delicious food he has made and he looked so happy. If I've remembered well, he did mentioned he'll cook for me again but I guess it'll not happen anymore.

There was a time we were walking along the beach and rows of houses on the other side. He told me to wait for him a min as he climbed over the fence to bring me a pressie. As he returned, his hand was with a tiny flower. A flower he told me that he has always saw everytime he passes this place and wanted to give to a person very special to him. He put it on my palm and smile at me.

many many stories later.

- A year later -

A Friend came to me one very early morning and share the news of an accident which he was at. A time where we have all lost him forever.


* Always treasure your love ones and every seconds you have with them. A moment of time last forever in our hearts. *

Lost of feelings

After many hearts broken later, it's pretty difficult to find a reason for it to beats meaningfully again. The process of life? ... The feeling of happiness are often amazing and when it disappears away, a part of me is goes along with it too.